Six Years After
by divinerosekeeper
Summary: I had missed him a lot. I wasn’t even going to try to deny that. He was my first love, hell; it was safe to say that he had been the love of my life. There would always be a part of me that would never entirely get over Scorpius Malfoy. rose


Six Years After...

_(warning: very long!!)_

I walked briskly across the cobblestone road of Diagon Alley, avoiding running into people that just seemed to be everywhere. I wasn't going anywhere in particular, so there was really no need for me to be rushing about, but I had always been one to walk fast like I was always mad. A strange quirk, I know. My brow furrowed, it's quite suffocating in a sea full of wizards, thank Merlin I didn't have claustrophobia.

Finally, I was in the wider part of the alley and I had some room to breathe. It was lightly snowing; little flurries were gently falling all around me. I smiled, I loved wintertime, it was the announcement of the upcoming holidays. But this winter came a tad bit too early as it was only November second, the Christmas decorations weren't even up yet. I breathed in the crisp air, this is what I liked best, the air always seemed so much more—pure.

I decided to head to the local bookstore, to see if I could find a good book. I started walking again and hey, there was even a little spring in my step, I couldn't help myself, going to a bookstore on a winter's day was just so very ideal to me. I looked up momentarily at the sky not realizing I was going to run into someone.

"Oof!" the breath taken all out of me and I fell over on the hard ground. "I'm sorry," I said and I opened my eyes to see an oh-so familiar face, despite the fact that I hadn't seen him in six years. His pallid face looked the same as ever except more chiseled and was more handsome.

"You always were very clumsy," he said with a slight smile, he held out his gloved hand to me, I took it, and he helped me up with such ease.

I looked up at him and I could feel my face soften, "Hello, Scorpius."

Scorpius gave me his infamous smirk, "Still wear your Ravenclaw scarf I see."

I rolled my blue eyes at him and scoffed, "So what? It's still a good scarf, it keeps me warm."

"Resourceful as always, I see," he put his hands in his deep black coat pockets, "you haven't changed a bit have you now, Rosie?"

My heart maybe skipped one or two beats… I had to admit, I still went tender when he calls me by that nickname. No, Scorpius, things haven't changed much in the past six years. But instead I said, "Nah." I crinkled my nose, something I always did whether I was being playful or in deep concentration.

There was a peaceful silence between us. I tried to conjure something to say, but what exactly do you say to someone you've been through a lot with but you've just seen them in the first time in what seems like eternity, for Merlin's sake!

I looked up at him; he was looking off towards the distance, although his expression was quite pleasant, he still had that aristocratic look to him. I noticed that he wore his hair differently now; it was gelled and combed back, making him look professional and older.

I finally had opened my mouth to say something, but he beat me to the punch, "Hey Rosie, how 'bout we go somewhere warm and catch up?" He motioned his head to the left motioning me to follow him. I smiled and nodded, and started to follow, this reminded me of when we'd walk around the grounds at Hogwarts when we were prefects, I used to follow his lead because of my fear of being outside of Hogwarts at night.

.+.

_**5**__**th**__** Year**_

I was under a tree looking around fidgeting, I was trying to take even breaths, which so far wasn't working. Merlin, I was about to have a panic attack. I. Hate. Being. Outside. Of. Hogwarts. Late. At. Night. By. Myself.

"Weasley!" I heard a voice call behind me.

I squealed out of fright and looked behind me, my wand pointing at the face at the owner of the voice. I realize that I must've looked quite ridiculous as my wand was still lit up from the _lumos _charm. Even more ridiculous was that the owner of the voice was unfortunately Scorpius Malfoy, and I couldn't stand the git.

With the light of my wand in his face, his annoyed expression was so much more intense. "What the hell is your deal, Weasley, seriously?"

I took my wand away from his face and strangely enough my body relaxed, only because I knew I wasn't alone, even despite the fact that Malfoy was my company. A scowl appeared on my face because I had a comeback: "Well one, you're here Malfoy."

Scorpius rolled his icy grey eyes at me, "Highly doubtful, you were already this way before I got to you. Plus, you were due back twenty minutes ago. What, were you so paralyzed with fear that you couldn't move?"

I glared at him and averted my gaze very sheepishly, not answering him. I didn't have a comeback this time.

I was expecting him to laugh; I had been totally waiting for it, anticipating it, and was quite shocked when it never came. I looked up at him, and was startled to see that his features were softened, he wasn't even smirking, he was actually giving me a sympathetic smile.

To be frank, I didn't exactly know how to act or even what to say. I couldn't exactly read what this out-of-character look meant… so I tried running.

Of course that never works with someone with as fast reflexes as Scorpius Malfoy. He easily grabbed my wrist, I sighed as I was forced to look back at him. "Malfoy, you can tease me about anything else, but please, not this. I'm sorry if my fear is humorous to you, but it isn't for me."

Scorpius groaned and gave me a serious look, "Weasley, it might be hard for you to believe, but I'm not that uncouth, I'm not like my father. Fears are nothing to be mocked."

Wow. For once in his life Scorpius Malfoy wasn't being a bastard.

"How 'bout this," He started, "you help me with my rounds and I'll help you with yours so you won't have to be so alone."

"Fine," I had agreed. I really didn't care if it was even Malfoy, I just absolutely hated being alone out there.

There was an awkward silence between us and then we finally realized that he was still holding my wrist, I gave him a quizzical look and he quickly dropped my wrist.

"We should be off, Weasley, it's late," he said starting to walk off, and I just simply followed.

.+.

We found our way to a small pub that was in a lesser-occupied area of the alley. It was warm in there and quite welcoming, and there was hardly anybody there. Scorpius led us to a secluded corner of the pub. He helped me take my grey pea coat off and took my scarf for me as well and then helped me into my chair. He then took off his own coat and gloves and fianlly took his own seat right in front of me, giving me his fullest attention.

I smiled, "So, how have you been?"

"Good, you?"

I chuckle, "I've been terrific, I might get a job as a professor next year at Hogwarts."

His eyebrows raised in surprise, "That's great, what would you teach?"

"Anything that's open, I excelled at everything, remember?"

He smirked, "Oh, could I not? You were always my competition."

I could feel a blush tickling my face, but I know it wouldn't even the least bit noticeable, as my face was still red from the cold.

I was relieved when a waitress came to take our orders; Scorpius ordered a fire whiskey, one of his most favored drinks since his sixth year. I just ordered a cocoa, as I wanted to keep a clear mind.

"And what have you been up to for all these years?" I ask taking a sip of my cocoa, which by the way was most delightful, as it warmed up my whole body.

With his finger he traced the rim of his glass, "I've been traveling and doing research, not much to be honest. Though, I've been considering about maybe getting a job in the ministry, which is why I'm back here in London."

"Any idea of what you want to do in the ministry?" I asked playfully.

Scorpius looked down at his fire whiskey and smiled, "No idea, Rose."

We sat in silence for what seemed like forever. I watched him intently; he was looking out the window, a pleasant smirk painted on his face. I remembered so very clearly the first time I ever touched those lips. It had been nothing like I ever felt before and I can remember exactly how I felt and what I thought during that moment.

.+.

_**6**__**th**__** Year**_

It was the last day before Christmas holiday, and Scorpius and I were done with our rounds for the night, and was walking me up to Ravenclaw Tower. Scorpius Malfoy had kept his word; he had accompanied me on all of my rounds as I with him and his rounds. We weren't best of friends, but I don't think we despised one another either. Toleration. That's a good way to describe it. We tolerated each other to a certain extent. Still there was an academic rivalry and he still insulted and teased me from time to time, and we were still on last name basis (which irked me a bit, but I wouldn't call him by his first name until he would call me by mine), but there was still improvement from before.

"So, Malfoy, what are your plans for Christmas?" I asked.

He started to untie his silver and green tie that had already been loose, "With my family at home, I suppose, unless my father has another surprise trip in mind. If anything I'll probably have to visit my aunt Daphne." Scorpius finally got his tie undone and just let it hang around his neck and looked over at me, slightly bored, "And you, Weasley?"

I sighed, a little envious, "Same as every year, my family and I and along with my bazillion cousins and uncles and aunts go to the Burrow." I slightly smile with a twinge of humor, "Father never does anything too spontaneous. So no surprise trips for me."

He smirked at me facetiously and gave a quiet snicker, "Well, the I hope you have a very Weasley Christmas, then."

I stopped walking, and glared and groaned at him, for some reason, I could feel tears forming in my eyes. Merlin, why did he have to make me feel ashamed about my name? And the way he always said "Weasley" was like it was a disease that he had to roll of his tongue as soon as he could. And why was I getting so worked up over this, all of sudden? Had he said this little remark before, it would have just rolled off my back. Besides, his remark wasn't even bad, at least he didn't call me a half-blood or anything. But lately his little insults and teasing were starting to get to me, and for whatever reason, this was the last straw.

"Bloody hell, Malfoy. Honestly, what's wrong with having the Weasley name?" I asked slightly exasperated.

His smirk melted off his face and actually formed the look of genuine concern. "Nothing, nothing at all," Scorpius said, walking towards me, I backed up from him because I wanted him the hell away from me. "I don't hate you for your name."

Scorpius practically had me backed up into a wall by then, "Then why do you hate me then?" I really had wanted to know why, he had been a complete prat to me since day one, and I had never done a single thing to him.

I was backed up into the wall and he stood in front of me, very close too. Uncomfortably close. One corner of his mouth lifted, but it wasn't a smirk, then I noticed how the first two buttons of his shirt were undone, and how sweet his breath smelled when it hit my face. And don't even get me started on his cologne. His grey eyes were looking into mine, quite intently, and because of this, I had failed to notice that he put his arms on either side of me, thus I was trapped. "I don't hate you, not at all, not one bit, _Rose_," his voice had been slightly husky.

Even though my heart was racing and a tear that escaped was trickling down my cheek, I managed to glare at him, "Then why—?"

Of course I was never able to finish my question because that git put his lips on mine.

All I could probably think was: WHAT IN THE NAME OF MERLIN?!

The kiss itself was probably very short and sweet, but for me it had seemed like an eternity until he finally parted his lips (powerful lips might I add), away from mine. He wiped away some of there tears that were still on my face, "To answer the question I interrupted, the only reason I act like I hate you is because I don't know how to act around you."

I imagined that I must've looked at him quite dumbly.

Scorpius backed up a few steps, "And I lied when I said there's nothing wrong with your last name." He seemed to hesitate, "Because of it, we could never be together." He had given me another glance, and then quickly walked away in the other direction, toward the Slytherin dungeons.

It had taken me quite awhile to finally stop looking in the direction that he had left. Eventually I had walked the rest of the walk to Ravenclaw Tower on my own.

-

During the holiday I had done nothing but wonder whether everything that had happened was genuine or a joke. Surprisingly, none of it seemed to be the latter. I didn't think that Scorpius Malfoy was capable of acting that well.

What had been pondered on even more was the fact that I had actually secretly, truly and deeply had enjoyed that kiss. I couldn't stand the git sometimes, but yet, when he was actually nice and decent human being, I had those butterflies tickling my rib cage. I had no clue where I stood when it came to him and how I felt.

But what I had wondered the most was how things were going to be after the holiday. I hadn't seen him on the train to Kingscross the morning after, which had been a relief and a disappointment. Was he going to avoid me or were things going to be awkward?

-

The first few days back at Hogwarts had been very nerve-racking. I never saw Scorpius, only during the classes we shared together and even then he wouldn't even glance at me. My cousin Al, a prefect from Gryffindor (he was also friends with Scorpius) had to tell me that Scorpius would be doing my outside rounds himself as long as I took his inside ones. So, he was avoiding me.

It was more of a disappointment than it was a blessing, and I knew that it was a weird concept. I missed him walking with me during rounds. I missed the scent of his cologne. I missed his sweet breath. I missed spending time with him. I had missed Scorpius Malfoy.

I had eventually decided to hunt him down and seek him out. I had found him in the library, he had been fixated on a book, probably had been studying for an upcoming transfiguration test. I stood across the table from him; I said nothing and just simply stared at him, waiting for him to acknowledge my presence. When that didn't work, I had to clear my throat in order to him to even look up at me.

"Yes, Weasley?" he said in a flat tone and he looked back down in his book.

A twinge of hurt ran through me because of him saying that in such a tone, "Oh, don't give me that, you prat."

Scorpius didn't respond to that, he had just kept reading his stupid book.

"Scorpius!" I hissed, trying to keep my voice at a low level.

He looked up at me, his grey eyes showing a flicker of annoyance and wonder, ah, that had gotten his attention, me using his first name. I almost gave the same kind of smirk that he himself was infamous for, but I kept my face serious.

He sighed, "What is it that you want?"

I rolled my eyes, "I need you to do rounds with me again, I don't like roaming the halls of this school alone at night any more than I like to outside." It wasn't a complete lie, I wasn't scared of doing rounds in the castle by myself, I just minded the fact that Scorpius wasn't there with me.

He had slightly frowned at this until he had reluctantly agreed.

And with that, I had left the library with a smug smile of satisfaction on my face. My stupid little plan had indeed worked.

-

Not much had been said during the rounds, which had made me flustered. And it was just two more flights of stairs to go until we would reach the Ravenclaw Tower. "Scorpius," I started, "I'm sorry that I'm a Weasley."

He scoffed, "Don't be ridiculous." He didn't look at me and had kept walking up the stairs.

I marched behind him, "And I'm sorry that you're a Malfoy."

He gave me a quick glare over his shoulder but still didn't stop walking. Only one more flight of stairs were left…

"I'm also sorry about how we've never truly gotten along." We were now going down the hallway that led to the Ravenclaw Tower; I was running out of time.

"Where are you going with this, Weasley?" he asked, still not stopping.

I blocked his way by standing in front of him, "Merlin, would you just stop walking for a second, you git?"

Scorpius glared at me.

I had taken a moment to breath and to prepare myself to what I had been about to say, "But I'm not sorry about what happened before the holiday."

His glare left his face but he still said nothing.

"And…" I say, starting to get on my tiptoes, "I'm not sorry for what I'm about to do." The last thing I see before I close my eyes were his grey eyes widening.

I let my lips touch his, and I feel him go rigid, but then it's quickly replaced with him responding to my kiss. I smirk and moved my lips from his, and turn around and walk towards the doorknob-less door that led to the Ravenclaw common room. "And by the way," I said turning around, "I'm not sorry about how I think we should be together anyway."

And thus started our relationship…

. +.

"How's Albus?" he asked, bringing me from memory lane and back to reality.

I smiled at the thought of my cousin; he had been the only one that ever really knew of me and Scorpius' relationship. "He's doing good, he's actually engaged."

Scorpius' blond eyebrows rose in surprise, "You don't say. Who's the lucky witch?"

"Her name is Kinley Bristow, she was a Gryffindor a year behind us," I said sipping more of my cocoa. "She's really great. Everyone in the family loves her, and she's just so nice to everyone."

He took a shot of his fire whiskey and rested his head on his hand, giving me a sad smile, "That's good, let him know that I congratulate him."

"I will," I said looking down awkwardly at my mug of half drunken hot cocoa. It was funny how we were talking about engagements, especially how we had once been engaged ourselves, to each other.

.+.

_**7**__**th**__** Year**_

I had been packing my trunks in my room; my last day at Hogwarts was going to be in three days. I was head girl, and I had a room all to myself. The room had dark blue walls, a floor made of white marble that was partially covered with a blue rug, the ceiling was the most fascinating as it was charmed to have a sky with a moon and a plethora shooting stars. The bed was pretty nice too; it was quite big and comfortable, with blue comforters and a canopy.

I had taken a minute from packing to look out the window, which showed a great view of the lake. The sun was setting and the lake had a bit of an orange hue to it. I smiled when I felt someone's strong arms wrap around my waste. Scorpius. My smile had gotten even bigger and I snuggled into him.

He had been made head boy, so it made things easier for our secret relationship. We shared a common room and a bathroom that was between our dormitories.

"What're you looking at?" Scorpius asked, putting his nose in my strawberry blond curls.

"The lake," I said breathing in his cologne.

"Does look pretty doesn't it?" he remarked.

"Mhm…"

"But it doesn't hold a candle to you."

I had playfully hit him on the arm and kissed his shoulder. His compliments had always been rather corny, but still managed to make me inwardly faint. What a silly little lovesick girl I was.

"So, excited?" I asked still looking out the window.

There was silence for a moment, but he eventually answered, "Yes and no."

"Hmm," I hummed. "Why's that?"

"Well, I am going to miss being here, and especially seeing you everyday and being with you. And of course I'm excited about finally being done with my education and moving on and being a true wizard," he paused, "and I have a surprise for you."

This had gotten my attention; I looked up at him, my cerulean eyes looked up at him with curiosity. "What kind of surprise?"

Scorpius smiled down at me, his grey eyes had a warmness to them, "I want to marry you."

I'm pretty sure my heart melted when he had said those five words. Pretty sure. Even though it was beating so damned fast and loudly, I'm pretty sure it still had melted.

I must've been completely and totally breathless because Scorpius had to ask me if I was going to give him a reply.

All I could allow myself to do was get on my tiptoes and kiss his lips. "Of course."

Not long after he would give me a marquise cut diamond engagement ring that he bought while on a trip in France. I kept it on a silver chain around my neck, so no one would ever see it.

.+.

We had been in the pub for almost an hour talking about what we had been doing in our lives, without getting too personal about things. We tried avoiding the following topics: girlfriends and boyfriends, fiancés, marriage, dating, sex, and our old romantic relationship or anything that would remind us of it.

It almost felt like old times again. Almost. Just not quite.

This saddened me slightly, but I was happy all the same because I was near him again. I missed him; I had missed him a lot. I wasn't even going to try to deny that. He was my first love, hell; it was safe to say that he had been the love of my _life_. There would always be a part of me that would never entirely get over Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, and I accepted that years ago.

He was still very much the same, his personality was still cool and collected, and he still had a knack for teasing me. His infamous smirk still had that haunting affect on me. _Still, still, still_…

I had been looking at my now empty cocoa mug when I felt that I was being looked at, and sure enough I saw Scorpius' eyes boring into mine, intense, but very unreadable. He didn't have a smile on his face, nor was he harsh looking. My eyebrows rose a little.

We stared at each other like that for a few moments. I was going to say something, but Scorpius finally spoke, "You know, I probably shouldn't even say anything about this at all, but I feel that I should…" I looked at him with uncertainty, what in the name of Merlin was he going on about? "I — " he hesitated as if figuring out what to say. "I-I never did marry Matilda Goyle."

It happened, he said it, and my heart lurched, he spoke the most forbidden topic, the reason for us not being together. I completely recovered, although I was giving a pathetic smile. "Oh?"

I could tell he was trying to get me to give him eye contact, but I didn't want to look up at him yet. He sighed and continued, "She had been with Abele Zabini the entire time. They were eventually found out because Matilda became pregnant with his child, so the whole engagement was broken off." I looked up at him and gave a smirk that was full of irony.

Deep down, I was cheering, thanking Merlin that he never married that wretched girl, and that she got knocked up by one of the biggest prats in the history—of well ever. Inwardly, I snickered to myself, but it still didn't change things I realized, which made the victory dance that was going on in my head disappear.

What Scorpius said next surprised me, as it made my blue eyes go wide open and I probably got whip lash from jerking my head all too fast, "Eventually, after that whole fiasco, I finally admitted to my father and mother about you."

My eyes started to sting, threatening me with the flow of tears. Scorpius held me in a tender gaze that was guilt ridden, I almost want to touch him, grab his hand or something, but decide against it.

"Mum was very saddened for me, and quite sorry that I had felt the need to hide it. She also tried encouraging me to try to get you back—but I knew that it was too late." Scorpius broke eye contact with me; "My father took it a lot better than I had ever imagined. I could tell he was slightly disappointed at the fact you're a Weasley, but said he was happy that I had turned out better than him. He was also sorry." He sarcastically laughed, looking out the window, "Had I known my parents would have been--" He didn't finish his sentence, he looked at me and instead said, "I'm sorry things got so fucked for us, Rosie." He took another shot of fire whiskey.

I shook my head and gave yet another pathetic smile, "Don't be."

.+.

_**A year after the engagement**_

I waited for him in the middle of the orchards of my grandparents' house that was called "The Burrow". It was a particularly warm night, as it was summer, so I wore a simple white and flowy summer dress. I breathed in deeply and slowly sat down on the welcoming grass.

It wasn't until a few minutes later that Scorpius finally apparated 10 feet away from me. At first he looked rather sullen looking, but it quickly changed to a small smile as he looked at me. Thanks to the moonlight and his all black clothing, his pallid skin and platinum blond hair was seemingly glowing. He walked over and was then in front of me and pulled me up into him. He held me for quite a long while and then kissed the top of my forehead.

"Sorry I'm so late," Scorpius said in such a hushed voice.

I beam, my eyes just lost in his, it had been three weeks since I had last saw him, so I was taking it all in. "It doesn't matter, you're here now," I said, interlacing my fingers with his.

I saw him looking down at my chest where the chain that held ring he gave me lay, "Pretty soon I should be finally able to put this on my finger, right?"

Our fingers unlaced and he cupped my face, kissing me very affectionately, his soft lips practically made my knees go weak. I wrapped my arms around his strong neck and he started to deepen the kiss, which of course I had no complaints about. His tongue licked my bottom lip, asking for an entrance, I quickly and eagerly complied. I tasted sweet peppermint in his mouth and a little bit of fire whiskey, usually, I would have complained about this, but I was already too intoxicated by Scorpius himself as it was.

He moved his hands from my face and let them slide down my shoulders, then traced them down the curves of my breasts (which caused such an excitement within me), and finally he had let his hands rest at the small of my back. Not long after, I had let him start to lead me down to the grass, carefully, we finally had ended up on the ground in a sitting position, and our tongues had been battling fiercely in a tango.

We had parted for a moment, as Scorpius taken off his jacket and laid it behind me (why he had been wearing it was a complete mystery to me). He raked his fingers gently through my strawberry wavy locks and whispered, "I love you, Rose."

I stroked his face along his high cheekbones and equally prominent jaw line and replied, "I love you, too." With that, he laid me down on his jacket.

-

I had laid against his hard and perfect chest, my hair was matted with sweat, and all I was able to smell was salt, the grass, and the faded smell of his masculine cologne. I snuggled closer into him, feeling rather content… I could feel Scorpius running his fingers through my hair, but even with him doing that, I knew something wasn't right, he hadn't spoken much, which was quite unlike him. "Scorpius," I murmur, my voice was hoarse.

"Yes," he said, he didn't look over at me, as he was too engrossed with the starry sky that was above him.

"Is there something the matter?" I looked up at him now, my eyes full of concern.

He groaned as he pulled the arm that had been around my shoulders away and he sat up abruptly, "Yea, actually."

I sat up too, using his jacket to cover my exposed body, my heart stopped beating for a moment out of fear. I managed to let out, "What's going on Scorpius?"

Scorpius ran his hands through his messy hair, "My parents are going to force me to marry Matilda Goyle." He had said this so quietly I almost hadn't heard it.

Matilda Goyle was the miserable offspring of Gregory Goyle and Pansy Parkinson, she had been the same year as Scorpius and I, of course she was a Slytherin.

"What?" I ask in disbelief, what was this, some kind of sick joke? "You're pulling my leg right?"

"No, but I wish I was!" he said angrily.

At first I was taken aback by his sudden outburst, but then I started to feel my blood boil with rage. "So, this is why you asked me to meet me here?" I snap.

Scorpius didn't answer me.

I bit my lip, "Ah, I see. Have one good last shag with the old fiancée before moving on with the new one, eh?" I got up quickly, tugging down the summer dress over my head. "You know, then would have been the best time to tell your parents that you're _already _engaged!"

He stood up too, giving me a fearsome look, "You know that's not it, Rose!"

"Or is it?" I spat. I looked away from him, "Merlin, couldn't you have just had the courage to finally tell your parents?"

"Oh don't give me that, you hypocrite," I heard him say. "It's not like I've seen you go up to your daddy and tell him about us either."

My fists had gone into balls at that one, "Because I've been waiting on you, you prat! I've been waiting since sixth year for you to be ready so we could have told our parents together! But you've been a complete coward and git and you've waited way too long."

He put his shirt back on and calmly said, "Fine, we'll tell our parents now."

"Don't bother," I muttered.

"What?"

"I said 'don't bother'. Merlin, Malfoy, are you deaf?" I knew using his last name was a low blow but I could've cared less, my heart was breaking.

I could see him mentally counting to ten backwards, but I chose to ignore this. Continuing I said, "Obviously, you weren't even half as committed to this as I was." I ripped of the chain around my neck and threw it in the ground in front of him, "Here's your ring back, maybe Matilda would like it."

"Keep it," Scorpius said in a low voice. He had had the most heart-wrenching look on his face that would haunt me for years after, and stupidly I did nothing before he took a few steps back and apparated, disappearing from me for the next six years.

It wasn't even two seconds after he left that I collapsed on the jacket he left behind and cried.

.+.

I twirled a piece of one of my long curls, nervously, not knowing what to say. I looked up at him, because he was chuckling at me. "What?" I asked a little bit irritated and self-consciously.

"You still have all of your same odd quirks, it amuses me," he said, sounding more cheerful again.

I rolled my eyes, "And you still have that stupid smirk of yours, so I wouldn't even be talking."

Scorpius' smile faltered a bit, but it returned just as fast, "So? Everyone loves my smirk."

"Glad to see that big ego of yours hasn't gone away either," I mumble.

"What was that, Rosie? I don't think I heard you correctly." He said somewhat facetiously.

"Oh, nothing," I said emitting the sound of innocence. I even batted my eyelashes for an added affect, which got a good chuckle out of the platinum blond man sitting across from me.

"Want to know when I really first started noticing you?" he unexpectedly asked. I felt something churn in my stomach, why did he have to bring up such unnerving topics?

Scorpius didn't wait for me to even respond and just went along with what he had wanted to say. "Believe it or not, it was in our third year, and it was on the first day of classes. As usual you were the first one in Transfigurations class, and you were just doing what you always did by reading a book to pass the time. Anyway, oi, when I saw you that day—you just seemed so different to me. You were more than that usual frizz ball that you had used to be to me."

I shake my head about how he had used to think of me as a "frizz ball", though, I had to admit, in my early years at Hogwarts it wasn't that much of an inaccurate description of me, actually, it was 100 accurate. It was before the summer of my third year that I had discovered make up and hair styling. Before that, I would just wash my face and brush my hair (even though it was curly and should have never had been brushed out too much in the first place) and was out the door. I learned to put product in my hair and to style it, and got a pretty fashionable hairstyle that would work for my type of hair, so it had been cut, only going an inch or so past my shoulders. I also experimented with make-up, although I didn't use much of it, as I had been completely terrible at it.

"To put it bluntly, that's when I finally noticed that you were a girl," he said in a funny tone. "Though, it took me until about towards the end of forth year for me to figure out that I was enamored with you," he confessed sheepishly.

I snicker at this, "Why didn't you just let me know earlier, you weren't shy with any other girl." It was true; Scorpius had been quite the playboy before we had dated.

"Because, you were the first person I think I ever truly and genuinely liked. Besides, you seemed unreachable. You seemed to good for me to get," He laughs at this and I give him a quizzical look, but he ignores it. "I mean, you were the first thing I couldn't have, and so I just resorted to insulting you." He sighs, and his face turned serious, "Maybe if I had done things differently, maybe our outcome could have been better."

Yes, my heart breaks at this, but I need to be the rational one. I reach for his hand across the table and take it into mine, holding it firmly and got him to look at me. "Scorpius," I said slowly, "there's no need to feel guilty anymore. What's done is done, I'm pretty sure that we've both forgiven each other, it all happened six years ago. And there's nothing we can do to change it, and there's no need for a time turner, because we're already both over it." To me, it sounded like I was trying to convince myself more than him. He didn't notice.

Scorpius stroked my tiny hand with his thumb and gave me a sad smile, "You're right Rosie."

-

We were almost on the main part of Diagon alley and were about to part. I look up at him, unknowing what to even say to him let alone how to act.

Scorpius puts his hands on my shoulder, arms length away from me, a safe distance. "Rose," he pauses, as if trying to think of the most appropriate thing to say. "I'm glad we got a chance to see each other again." He pauses yet again and looks away chuckling and then looks right back at me, "And no matter what, I will always be sorry."

I was going to say something, but he pulled me into a very strong embrace. It takes me a moment or two to react; I wrap my arms around his waist as well, enjoying the warm and familiar feeling of him holding me. I smile, almost wanting to nuzzle myself deeper in his embrace, but of course stop myself, as it wouldn't be right.

The embrace lasted probably five times longer than it ever should have, but neither of us made a complaint. Scorpius abruptly held the top of my head, kissed it, and muttered something into my hair, that vaguely sounded like "I love you", but before I could have done or said anything about it, he had already turned and was walking in the other direction.

.+.

_**7**__**th**__** Year**_

I had been lying down on the over sized sofa in the heads' common room trying to concentrate on a book my mother had given me last Christmas. It wasn't working obviously, as my mind tended to wander on to other things.

I looked over that the clock that was on top of the fireplace mantel, 8:20. Damn. It would be another ten minutes until Scorpius would walk through the portrait hole from Quidditch practice.

I was ultimately surprised when the portrait hole opened and he walked in, sweaty and flushed. His practice robes are quite a bit dirty, and his broom that was in his hand looked a little less new than it had before. I looked him over, "You're early."

He huffed and gave me an exasperated look. "What, would you like me to leave and come back in a few minutes?" he asked jerking his thumb behind him.

I got up off the couch; the book that had been in my lap carelessly fell to the floor. I ran my fingers through his slightly sweaty hair that just seemed to go everywhere at the moment, I grinned and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Nah, stay. I kind of like you here early."

"Oh really?" he said mockingly.

I rolled my eyes at him and sat myself back on the couch, waiting for his next move. He smirked at me and calmly walked over, dropping his broomstick on the way. Scorpius picked me up off of the couch and then sat down on it, putting me on his lap. I was quite comfortable and I wrapped my arms around his neck that was still a little bit sticky. We looked into each other's eyes, my blue mixed with his grey. I felt at peace.

He kissed me on my forehead, his lips left a burning sensation on my skin and I grazed my mouth over his chin. Not long after, he cupped my face and immediately had started to kiss me passionately. Once again, no complaints. We explored one another's mouths hungrily; it had been almost too hard for me to keep up with him.

I noticed when he started to take off his robe; my stomach must've done a billion flips at seeing that. I had wondered if what we had been doing was really going to go _there_. But I had ignored it, trying to just go through all of it with the emotions. I had barely noticed that I was starting to untie my blue and bronze Ravenclaw tie, and that's when I had realized that it was indeed going _there_. I felt my stomach muscles tightened, I had become slightly nervous, but excitement had outweighed any of that.

I helped him out of his shirt as he trailed light kisses down my neck. We were starting to unbutton my own shirt, when he suddenly stopped everything to look at me, with full eye contact and a face that was completely sober. I looked at him bewilderedly, wondering why in the bloody hell he had stopped.

"I love you," he said, his eyes stay fixated on mine. He wasn't lying.

My heart stopped, and then started again, racing.

I breathe and smile at him, he was waiting for an answer, "I love you too."

He kissed me again, only briefly though, as he got up, carrying me bridal style and we apparated into his room…

-

I woke up the very next morning with the sun coming in past the dark green curtains that hung above the windows. It had taken me a split second to remember why I was in Scorpius' dorm. When all of the memories from the night before flooded into my mind I had blushed. I thanked Merlin that at least it was a Saturday meaning that I hadn't missed any of my classes, but then I realized because of what had happened the night before, Scorpius and I failed to do our nightly rounds. Oops.

I took in the room. It was mainly a very dark green, with accents of silver here and there. I noticed that his sky was charmed with stars of the constellations, I almost laughed when I saw that the constellation of Scorpius was up there.

I snuggled in deeper into the satin green and silver blankets, I was a little peeved at the fact that his bed seemed more comfortable than mine. I looked over at the man next to me, he looked like an angel, his features were calm and relaxed as he quietly snored. I beamed, and my heart swelling up with pure happiness. I soothingly moved a piece of hair that was in his face, his eyes cracked up, which had made me jump a bit.

Scorpius grinned at me, "Morning."

"Good morning," I said, kissing the tip of his nose.

"How do you feel?" his eyes had a flicker if concern, and I knew exactly what he had been referring to.

"Fine," I said. I grinned devilishly when I commanded, "Say it again."

He looked at me puzzled, "Say _what _again?"

And I gave him an annoyed look.

His face lit up, "Oh." Scorpius then chuckled, "I love you, Rose."

I bit my lip, trying to hold in all the excitement that had been running through my veins, "I love _you_."

I squealed when he pulled me on top of him. I looked down at his grinning face and then he kissed me.

.+.

I take out the chain that had been hiding under all my sweaters, and lifted up the ring that was attached to it. Although, it was seven years old now, it still looked the same as it always had.

The night we had broken up I picked up the chain and did a simple _Reparo _spell to fix where I had yanked the chain off of my neck. Once I had put the chain back on, I had never taken it off since. I fingered the ring while looking at Scorpius who was at quite a distance by now.

My heart is racing.

And I'm being indecisive.

I know I still love him, _immensely_.

I had never stopped.

I was now debating whether to chase after him or turn back around and never look back, where my life would be much simpler.

I closed my eyes and took a step in whatever direction destiny took me…

**Authors corner: (i changed the rating, it didn't seem too bad)**oh my god. I'm finally done with this damn thing. I wonder what destiny decided for her, Scorpius or no Scorpius? This thing is quite long for a one-shot, don't you think? Haha. 7,641 words and it's on 14 pages. Wow. Anyway, for my kingdom hearts and inuyasha readers. I'm sorry if this disappointed you that I made another new fic instead of updating my other fics. Well, I haven't updated anything in like a year, and I might not ever. I'm sorry. I would love to take the time, believe me, but my styles of writing has changed since I was 13 and I have other interests.

Anyway: I didn't expect it to turn out to be anything like _this_. I hope you guys liked it. It's my first fic that even hints at sex. AHAHA. Hope it wasn't too craptastic. I had pondered on the idea of her getting pregnant after that orchard scene, but I decided it would have been too much. And I had almost cut out the last flashback, but then I realized it was all too important. Hahaha. Anyway, I really hope you guys enjoyed. Please give me some good feedback. Constructive criticism would be nice to help me better my writing. :

Ps: sorry for any inconsistency with past and present tenses—especially on the flashbacks. Hahahaha. I tired to fix up as much as I could, but I did get quite a bit lazy.

Pss: i do not own harry potter.

**_PSSS: i forgot to add that i've been thinking of making a sequel. problem is: i need to think of one. any ideas? and also. sorry for any spelling/grammatical errors. i did double check my self more than usual, but it was 5:30 in the morning and i just wanted this damn thing done. hahahaha_**

So yea.

Love,

Tabbie


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